Are there methods to cure tendencies to cheat on someone and be cheated on.

Can tendency to have an affair be cured?

 

I am going to talk about

 

1 – Tendencies of having an affair based on genders (male and female)

2 – Relationship between Money and rate of cheating on partners

3 – Relationship between history of having affairs and having potential affairs

4 – Self-Expansion – How does having an affair occur?

5 – Age of tendency to have an affair

6 – Females tend to increase the rate of having an affair as they become older until 50”s.

7 – Research on change in estrogen and having an affair

8 – Why does females have an affair during period?? –bilateral symmetry

9 – How can males figure out whether their faces are symmetrical or not??

10 – How can you reduce the rate of having an affair?

11 – How can you practice disengagement?

12 – Tendencies of females and males in terms of their looking.

13 – Relationship between satisfaction in sex and tendency to cheat on partners

14 – Relationship between frequency of having sex before marriage and tendency of cheating on partners in marriage

15 – Relationship between having an affair and introvert and extravert personalities.

 

 

1 – Tendencies of having an affair based on genders (male and female)

 

Males tend to cheat on their partners due to their personalities whereas females tend to cheat on their partners due to their relationship issues.

Research conducted by Indiana University in 2011 shows that 23 % of males tend to cheat on their partners whereas interestingly 19 % of females tend to cheat on their partners.

 

Males who have strong sexual desire or worry about their potential sexual disability (worry about their potential inability to erect during sex) tend to cheat on their partners.

Whereas females whose relationships with their partners are not going well cheat on their partners. It is twice higher rate.

Also, females who don’t get on with each other sexually tend to cheat on their partners. It is 3times higher rate.

This means males’ tendencies may not be fixed. However, females’ tendencies can be improved if their relationships are fixed.

 

2 – Relationship between Money and rate of cheating on partners

 

When human beings gain more money than before, their tendencies to cheat on their partners become higher. If you got married with your partner when you didn’t have money, the rate of your having affairs may become higher once you earn more money.

In some research, there are two different groups. Subjects in Group A were asked to write what you buy if you earn a lot of money whereas ones in Group B were asked to write how you cut down on money for food expense. Then, they were shown photos of attractive people (if you are males, you look at attractive females), and they were asked to talk to them. Group A people tended to sit closer to the attractive people whereas Group B people tended to sit further than the attractive people. This means that human beings tend to approach to attractive people if they get more money.

 

3 – Relationship between history of having affairs and having potential affairs

 

Denver university in 2007 had experiment with 480 subjects. They were asked if they have an affair before and they had been checked as to their relationship patters for 5 years. If subjects had an affair even once within 5 years in the past, the rate of having an affair is 3.4 times higher than those who didn’t have an affair within 5 years in the past.

If subjects were cheated on within 5 years in the past, the rate of being cheating on by their partners again is 2.4 times higher than those who were not cheated on by their partners within 5 years in the past.

This research shows that those who cheated on their partners in the past tend to repeat cheating on their partners whereas those who were cheated on tend to be victims of being cheated on repeatedly.

This research reports that those who are cheated on tend to love those who cheat on their partners.

They repeat the same pattern!  Scary.

 

4 – Self-Expansion – How does having an affair occur?

 

One of the causes of having an affair is called Self-expansion.

Paddle university had experiment in which subjects were asked to talk to others via online app.

They were asked to talk to two types of groups. One of them tends to have high curiosity for their own hobbies (sticking to the same hobbies instead of seeking new hobbies) and the other tends to like something new and unique.

They found that if people have not gained new knowledge and/or new experiences with their partners, they feel stagnant in the relationships with their partners. They have more feeling to cheat on someone else.

They feel their growth has stopped via the relationships. Once growth in relationships becomes ceased, human beings tend instinctively to look for new partners. This is called self-expansion.

Based on this concept of self-expansion, having children helps their parents usually grow together.

 

5 – Age of tendency to have an affair

 

In 2016, David B Ph.D asked 1200 couples whether or not they had affairs or not. 

There are variants of having affairs.

Males tend to have an affair consistently regardless of ages.

23 % of males tend to have an affair in their teenager.

26 % of them tend to have an affair in their 40’s.

 

Females rarely have an affair in their teenager. The older they become, the more they have an affair. 

6 % of females tend to have an affair in their teenager.

17 % of females tend to have an affair in 40’s.

After they turn 50 years old, the rate decreases.

 

6 – Females tend to increase the rate of having an affair as they become older until 50”s.

 

Potential reasons for the rate of having an affair among females are that after they give birth to their children, their children grow out of their hands in their 40s and the rate of pregnancy becomes lower as they become older.

 

7 – Research on change in estrogen and having an affair

 

females who are going through monthly period tend to experience mood swings. How does change in estrogen have to do with having an affair??

Even though their sexual desire biologically encourages them to have children, they don’t have to have an affair usually.  When their ovulation period comes, they tend to have sex with other males somehow.

 

Here are very interesting reasons that cause them to have sex with other males, not with their partners during the ovulation period.

 

8 – Why does females have an affair during period?? –bilateral symmetry

 

This means that if males don’t have his face symmetrical, their partners (females) tend to be cheated on during their ovulation period.

New Mexico University has done research on how hormone balance relates to how females have an affair in 2015. 54 couples participated in the experiment.  These female partners were asked whether to want to have sex with their partners (males). Also, skeletal structure of their partners (males) was checked up in details to check whether their structure of the body was balanced or imbalanced. If their muscle skeletal structure is well-balanced, their gene is healthy. However, as they grow up, it is possible that the muscle skeletal structure becomes imbalanced due to errors in their genes when they have illness or injure. Females want to have sex with males who have symmetrical faces due to their healthy gene. This is why females seek for handsome males who tend to have symmetrical faces.

As a result, the research team in this university discovered that sexual desire of females to have sex with males who have symmetrical faces during ovulation period increases by 25 % !!

On the contrary, sexual desire of females to have sex with males who do not have symmetrical faces during ovulation period decreases by 25 %.  These female subjects whose partners’ (males) faces were not symmetrical reported that they want to have sex with other males whose faces were symmetrical.

 

9 – How can males figure out whether their faces are symmetrical or not??

 

They can check whether their partners want to have sex with them during ovulation period or during non-ovulation period.

 

Basically, females want to give birth to their children whose fathers have better genes biologically speaking.

 

10 – How can you reduce the rate of having an affair?

 

There are two techniques to do it.

• Disengagement
• Mindfulness

Florida State University in 2018 collected 223 newly married couples who were asked how satisfied their lives were in their marriage. In the experiment, they were showed two kinds of pictures. One of them has attractive (good looking) people whereas the other one is an average looking people.

As a result, if they are able to distract themselves from the pictures of the attractive people within 200 to 300 milli seconds, 50 % of having an affair was lower among those who are able to distract themselves from these pictures within 200 to 300 milli seconds than those who were unable to do so.

In other words,

Even though human beings tend to look at attractive people biologically which is unavoidable, people who tend to gaze at attractive people longer may have more tendency to have an affair than those who do it shorter.

This means,

If you are able to conduct disengagement, you tend to have an affair less.  

 

11 – How can you practice disengagement?

 

Practice mindfulness or meditation.

These skills help you catch yourself in a moment of focusing on attraction.  

 

I recommend MBSR (Mindfulness – Based Stress Reduction) or

my youtube video – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rx3RreFCc5k&t=24s

 

 

12 – Tendencies of females and males in terms of their looking.

 

Attractive (good looking) females tend to have more affairs than less attractive (good looking) females.

Males tend to have more affairs if their partners’ (females) looking are not that good whereas females do not have this tendency.

 

Less attractive (good looking) males tend not to have an affair.

If you are a male and you have your own girlfriend. If she does not have a good looking, you tend to have an affair. However, if you are a female and you have your own boyfriend, and if he does not look good, you tend not to have an affair.

In conclusion,

Tendency that females cheat on their partners depends on their own looking whereas tendency that males cheat on their partners depends on their partners’ looking.

 

13 – Relationship between satisfaction in sex and tendency to cheat on partners

 

Based on research, if you are satisfied with having sex with your partner, it is more possible for you to cheat on your partner. This occurs because you have more positive perspective toward sex that enables you to more curious about sex. This is an interesting result because we usually assume that if you are not satisfied with having sex with your partner, it is more possible for you to cheat on your partner.

This implies that your sex life may need to be good enough and not that bad (moderately satisfactory) instead of too satisfying or too dissatisfying.

 

14 – Relationship between frequency of having sex before marriage and tendency of cheating on partners in marriage

 

Before marriage, if males have a lot of sex with multiple partners in short term relationships, they tend to have an affair whereas females have a lot of sex with multiple partners in short term relationships, they tend not to have an affair. This occurs to females because females tend to find the best partner who has the best gene to pass it to her children biologically.

 

15 – Relationship between having an affair and introvert and extravert personalities.

 

-Extravert females tend to have an affair.

-Both males and females tend to be cheated on if they have tendency to be nervous or anxious (neurosis) because their partners tend to cheat on them.

Florida State University has conducted research in which 277 couples were collected. They discovered that extravert females tend to cheat on their partners whereas introvert females tend not to cheat on their partners.

Regardless of genders, if you tend to be nervous and anxious(neurosis), your partner tends to cheat on you. If you don’t want to be cheated on, you may need to improve your nervous and anxious tendency.

If males have female partners who are narcists, they (males) tend cheat on them.

 

 

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